This writer wishes to congratulate Preston FC’s Manager and LSS President-elect, Randle Enitan on his victory at the LSS polls. CONGRATULATIONS Oh man with The Benfica Fez cap
*A minute silence Ladies and Gentlemen*
Oh no, on the contrary, NOBODY DIED! Here’s why I asked you all to do that. AFL has ended, EPL, La Liga, BUNDESLIGA, SERIE A, LIGUE 1 and other leagues are concluded already…Worse still, Nigerian League(...)
more exclusive detail after the cut!
IS STILL ON! (Please please shoot me through the Nostrils right now). Now you get the gist?
BREAKING NEWS: Classic FC wins The AFL title! In some other much related news, Water is wet, Fire is hot and President Obama is not actually a woman. From the stable of The Talisman (a.k.a The Archbishop of BANTERbury), CONGRATULATIONS!!!
Now that the league is over, The Talisman is flashing back, dishing out Prizes to certain individuals.
COACH OF THE SEASON: Oh that’s easy. Step forward, Coach Paale! A manager who never won a game while in charge of a team in his first time out as Coach, getting a new job before getting fired at half time of the second game in his new job. Thank you for the comedy…EXCEPTIONAL!
DEFENDER(s) OF THE SEASON: There’s a tie here. This award goes to each and every one who played in the defence for Mu’naj this season. Constantly shipping in goals even while Mu’naj wasn’t playing (walkovers) yet, they didn’t concede more than 4 in any game, some teams conceded 7! TERRIFIC!
GOALKEEPER(s) OF THE SEASON: Actually there’s another tie here. Goes to both goalies who were in goal for Wolves during the season for conceding almost 15+ goals ONLY during the group stages. They’d be disappointed that they didn’t reach 24 goals but nonetheless, that is REMARKABLE!
OFFICIAL OF THE SEASON: This writer doesn’t even know the lad’s name but he’s a linesman. Highlight of his career was The Galaxy-Alpha game. Ball goes out for a throw-in, flag is pointed to the right and his hand is pointed to the left, thereby convincing this writer that he doesn’t actually watch football. He either checks Livescores.com and Goal.com, listens to the match commentaries on Radio or probably still plays Winning 11 game or SEGA. IMPRESSIVE officiating, Son
WORST STRIKER OF THE SEASON: This was quite easy, step forward, Stefano Onukak. Why? Because he broke the rules of The Talisman’s football which clearly states that:
“No player shall be allowed to score more than 3 goals in a game. If he does, all his goals in that game shall be awarded to the opposing team for Charity’s sake”
So, did he score more than 3 goals in a game? Check. Did he donate those goals to Preston FC? No. Check.
OWNER OF THE SEASON: Except you’ve seen Roman Abrahimovich don a Chelsea jersey with a full kit to partner Diego Costa at the front, or watched Sheikh Mansour start a game ahead of Sergio Aguero, then the CLASSIC OWNER starting upfront against Veterans FC, facing the opposing goalie one-on-one during the game before deliciously doing a Torres or a Yakubu is absolutely BRILLIANT!
Afterall, it was Napoleon Bonaparte who said: “If you want a thing done, do it yourself”
ASSIST OF THE SEASON: First rule of goalkeeper Clearance, “Kick the damn ball as far away as possible” So when a goalkeeper (IZU), instead of doing that, carefully lays a brilliant pass to an opposing player (BOLAJI) who shoots immediately (The Suarez Style), then the goalie gets to win this award. This writer commends IZU with this award for his spirit of sportsmanship
Alright, this is as far as I can go, thank you very much for wasting sometime of your life reading this and every other nonsense I’ve written all through the AFL season. From me I say, GOD BE WITH YOU (wait for it…wait for it…get some tissue paper in case you wanna cry) TILL WE MEET AGAIN! Gracias
Crazy somebody! lmao
ReplyDeleteHahaha...that owner of the season tho.Tunde na you this guy bash like this?
ReplyDelete