Due to time, I'll just go straight to the point.
Drop out of school to marry
Never never never do that
Marriage is not the zenith of life but the beginning of a new phase.Going in without the ability to provide is not advised.This message is particularly relevant to the ones marrying men overseas,I have seen that happen,the papers come through and you abandon your education to go to Obodo Oyibo.It is a foolish thing to do,many have regretted it.A bird in hand is worth two in the bush.
Bad mouth your family to your fiancé/husband
If you have already done so,don't beat yourself up.Learn from it,marriage sometimes can be like a law court,whatever you say can be used against you when you least expect it.Apply wisdom.even if your parents hate your husband or fiancé with a passion,don't reveal the extent or relay their words verbatim.You may eventually marry him but the man will never forget how they felt about him and the painful things they said.
Share secrets of your friends with your man
There is a code of friendship that cannot be broken.If a friend for instance has confided in you with certain deep secrets that will show her in a bad light,please keep it to yourself,including certain utterances that are unwholesome,don't share.there are some things you must take to your grave.I learned this the hard way.I had a friend that was fond of talking ill of Nigerian men and I shared those stories years ago,my husband remembers it till this day and doesn't like her much for that.
Compare your situation with that of others even in light hearted humor
When you compare your household with that of others,you are basically telling the man he is not man enough.Be content with what you have and strive together towards doing better.Many young marriages go through strain especially financial strains.Be patient and hope and pray for a better tomorrow,the earnings usually increase as the years go by.
Tell your family details of your marital challenges
Very common with young marriages especially for people from a close knit family.Unless your life is in danger,shut your mouth.If you must unburden your heart,find a trusted friend,your pastor's wife,a deaconess in church, a wise auntie,anyone but your mom and siblings.They will never forget the stories you told them and will always view your husband through those prisms long after the issues have been resolved.A third party non relative is preferred.
Go sourcing monetary help for the family
Allow the man to do it.you put yourself in vulnerable positions as a female by going out to beg or borrow money for the family if such need arises.Don't take on the role of a rescuer in the marriage.There are some things you should allow the man take the lead in and this is one of them.
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